S&S half

bring back livejournal for the fans who love sophie and maddie

hay all this site is sitting here doin nothing where we can post for free plz use this site again not for sophie and sian but for sophie and Maddie now come on they need us to show them that sophie and sian inspired us now lets show them sophie and Maddie does to even tho you don't say I love you showing someone you'll live like they do saids so much more SO FOR ALL YOUR SOPHIE AND MADDIE FANS JOIN ME AND SHOW BROOKE AND AMY WE ARE WITH THEM AND THEY INSPIRE US TO BE WHO WE ARE AND TO HELP THOS WE LOVE WITH ACTION
high heels

The Weakness in Me (Chapter 4)

Chapter 4
Walking silently across the room Sian reached across taking the throw that was on the back of the couch, laying it across the sleeping brunette, she bend down as she gently brushed some hair away from her face. She didn’t know what it was about this woman that intrigued her, all she knew was that she wanted to protect her, look after and care for her, but somehow she knew this wasn’t some-one that would accept her help that easily.
Sophie purposely avoided the young blonde over the next few days, embarrassed that she’d let her guard down and shown the weakness within her as she perceived it, to an almost total stranger. What was it about this woman that made her want to talk about Vicky so much, share her feelings and her pain, when for years it didn’t matter who’d tried, family, friends, doctor’s she’d kept it all hidden away, afraid for her own sanity if she ever let all that pain and heartache out.
Rubbing her face with her hands, Sophie let out a long sigh as she looked around the small book shop. She hadn’t had a customer all morning, not a soul had passed through her door. What was she going to do, she knew she couldn’t keep this up forever she’d be lucky if she could meet the bills at the end of the month never mind take a wage for herself. Maybe she should just cut her loses and close, at least then she’d be able to formulate a plan, not be in limbo like she was now. She hated the thought but what else could she do, if she carried on like this she’d be forced to close anyway.
‘Cup of tea’ she said to herself sighing as she stood and entered the small kitchenette area. No sooner had she filled the kettle when she heard the bell above door ring indicating that some-one had just entered.
‘Won’t be a sec’ she shouted out as she hurriedly wiped her hands on the kitchen towel and walked briskly back into the shop.
‘Hi’ she said brightly as she spotted her first customer of the day crouching down running her fingers along the book spines situated on the shelf.
‘Hey’ came the reply making Sophie catch her breath.  Stood there was the blonde she’d been trying to avoid for days, her hair tied up in a loose ponytail with wisp’s dangling either side of the black rimmed glasses she was wearing, which only served to make her look even cuter if that was even possible Sophie noted.
‘I’ve just been to the Uni to see if I can transfer there from my old place’ Sian said brightly taking off the glasses and placing them in her bag.
Sophie smiled and nodded experiencing the familiar feeling of heat pricking her cheeks and the tightness in her chest.
‘Mike said you had a book shop around here so I thought I’d pop in and say hi seeing as we really haven’t seen much of each other the last few days’ the blonde continued raising her head and greeting Sophie with the brightest smile she’d ever seen.
The brunette couldn’t help but smile, there was something so affable, so easy-going about her best friend’s sister’s demeanour, it had been years since she felt so at ease and yet at the same time so fearful in some-one’s presence.
Letting out an uncomfortable cough Sophie half turned in the direction of the kitchen pointing, ‘I’ve just put the kettle on, would you like a cup of tea’ she stuttered barely able to get the words out.
Sian let out a giggle as she nodded her head, ‘that would be lovely, thank you’ she replied.
Sophie hurriedly made her way back into the kitchen leaning her hands on the unit’s in front of her she closed her eyes as she bowed her head taking deep breaths as she desperately tried to get her emotions under control. ‘Jesus, why do I have to behave like such a complete fucking lunatic every time I see her’ she chastised herself.
Sian decided to have a wander around the shop, although she was taking a degree in marketing and media, she always had a love of literature and it had been such a difficult decision for her to make as to what to major in, but the jobs market as it was finally making that decision for her. Perusing the shelves she noted how cared for and looked after the books were from the biggest leather clad novels to the thinnest pamphlets, not a speck of dust or mark on any of them. Picking out one she recognised she ran her hand over the shiny gloss cover.
‘The Great Gatsby’ she heard coming from behind her as two cups were placed on the counter top.
‘Yeah’ Sian smiled
‘Have you read it’ Sophie asked with an inquisitive arch of her eyebrow as she brought the steaming cup to her lips.
‘No, but I’ve always wanted to’ the blonde replied ‘The new film that’s just come out look’s great don’t you think’, she continued turning her gaze back to the glossy cover.
‘Then go see the film’ Sophie replied curtly, making the blonde snap her eye’s to the coolness starting back at her.
‘That’s a strange thing to say, I was expecting the opposite from you’ Sian replied walking over to the counter placing the book down.
Sophie sighed as she sat on the stool behind the counter, gesturing for Sian to join her on the adjoining chair as she slid her tea to her across the counter.
‘Okay’ she started ‘I know that it’s considered a classic, but myself I just found it confusing’ Sian pulled the stool closer to the counter as she became engrossed in what her obviously learned friend had to say.
‘Now don’t get me wrong F. Scott Fitzgerald is a wonderful writer, but I just didn’t like this book, it was too embellished, too detailed, the tiniest aspects described in the most overbearing, rambling way that it just detracted and at the same time distracted you from the story’ she said turning on the stool to face the by now enthralled young woman sat next to her.
‘This for example’ she continued opening the book and picking out a paragraph as Sian snuggled closer to her to read what the brunette was pointing to.
Out of the corner of his eye Gatsby saw that the blocks of the sidewalks really formed a ladder and mounted to a secret place above the trees—he could climb to it, if he climbed alone, and once there he could suck on the pap of life, gulp down the incomparable milk of wonder’. Sophie read from the book stunning Sian with her passion and enthusiasm for the subject.
‘Have you any idea what that means’ Sophie asked turning her head to meet the admiring gaze and affectionate smile of her companion.
‘No’ Sian murmured shaking her head slightly her eye’s not faltering from the blueness staring back at her.
‘No neither do I’ Sophie replied her voice dropping to little more than a whisper, as once again her mind became foggy, and her mouth became dry, letting her eye’s flicker from the cool blue orbs to the luscious pink lips of the blonde and back again she felt herself begin to lean forwards, pulled in by the inviting semi opened mouth. Then immediately Vicky’s face flashed into Sophie’s mind’s eye instantly making her recoil, jolting backwards she let out an uneasy cough.
‘Tender is the Night’ is a much better choice if you want to read Fitzgerald she said tersely standing as she gathered up her cup and walked into the kitchen.
What the hell just happened then’, Sian thought to herself rubbing her forehead as she sat wide-eyed in confusion at just almost letting another girl kiss her.
Shit I did, didn’t I, I nearly........... fuck’ she continued to question herself as her hand dropped to cover her mouth as by reflex she glanced her eyes towards the open kitchen door where she could hear the brunette clatter about.
All these feelings raging around inside her were so confusing for the young blonde, she’d never felt anything like this before for another woman, well that’s not strictly true,  she did have that crush on Miss Thomas in year 10, but that was just an admiration thing ............  wasn’t it?
Shit’ she scolded herself. She didn’t know what these feelings were but what she did know was that when she was with this sad, lost, tortured soul she forgot all about the burning anger and crushing loneliness she’d felt since the day Ryan had abandoned her and their unborn child.
That’s it’ she thought to herself as sudden realisation dawned on her for the reason for all these alien feelings,
That’s exactly it’ her mind squealed triumphantly as it all started to become clear to her. Reaching down she covered her ever slightly expanded abdomen with the palms of her hands, ‘hormones,’ she thought to herself nodding ‘that’s all it is ..............  pregnancy hormones’.
‘So have they agreed to let you transfer over’ the words snapping Sian out of her trance as she glanced up at the brunette who was wiping her hands on a tea towel in the kitchen doorway.
‘Sorry’ Sian replied confused at the question.
‘The Uni’ Sophie replied throwing the tea towel in the direction on the draining board. ‘Are they gonna let you transfer’.
‘Oh, yeah, yeah’ Sian replied nodding letting a relieved giggle leave her lips. ‘They’ve just got to get my notes and that over from my last Uni and then I can start’.
‘Great’ Sophie replied with a grin, ‘so when’s that’
‘Probably in about 3 weeks’ Sian responded.
‘So what is it you’re doing’ the brunette asked as she busied herself tidying a stack of magazines on a table in the centre of the shop.
‘Marketing and Media’ Sian replied please that Sophie seemed to be taking an interest in what she was doing.
‘Maybe I should have taken something like that’ the brunette quipped referring to the lack of customers ‘I could do with some ideas of how to drum up business’ she said absentmindedly as she continued to tidy the unruly stack of student magazines.
‘Well why don’t I help you’ Sian offered throwing the brunette a grin and raised eyebrows,
‘I mean I’m not going to be doing anything for the next couple of weeks at least, AND it’ll be good on my C.V.’ she enthused making Sophie grin at her.
‘If you’re sure’ the brunette replied letting out a small laugh, ‘I’d really appreciate the help’.
‘Okay’ Sian smiled as she reached into her bag taking out a notebook, and putting on her reading glasses.
‘Right, so do you have a web site’ she asked as she looked up and cocked her head at the brunette studying her.
‘Nope’ Sophie replied getting a shocked expression and an exasperated gasp in return.
‘Then that’s the first thing we need to do’ the blonde replied as she scribbled in her note book.
‘But that’ll be expensive won’t it,  ............... and’ Sophie trailed off as she lowered her eye’s to the floor.
Sensing what the brunette meant, Sian stood and made her way around the counter.
‘Not necessarily’ she replied smiling ‘I can construct a website for you, all you’ll have to pay for is the domain name and some-one to host it for you and Bob’s you uncle or Fanny’s you aunt whatever way you wanna look at it’ she laughed, raising a giggle from the brunette at the same time, ‘We can even set it up as an e-commerce site, like an on-line shop’ she clarified ‘Orders can be placed on-line and we can set it up to receive payments electronically’ she ended with a flourish.
‘You’d do that for me’ Sophie replied getting a shrug and a shy smile in return.
‘Course’ Sian squeaked out shyly as she felt her cheeks burn under the glare of the brunette opposite her.
‘It’s the least I can do, after all you’ve done for me’ she whispered catching Sophie’s eye once more, as they both started to close the distance between them, so engrossed were they that neither noticed the sound of the door bell as some-one entered.
‘Ahem’ the cough, making the women snap their heads in the direction the sound had come from.
‘Hi Sophie’ came the dulcet tones that the brunette recognised.
Hi Emma’ she sighed.
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The Weakness in Me (Chapter 3)

Chapter 3
‘Tina, Sophie, I’d like to introduce you to some-one that’s very special to me’ He beamed.
‘This is Sian, my sister’.
‘And this is your room’ Mike announced proudly as he held the bedroom door open for his sister to peruse her new domain.
Smiling the blonde haired girl strolled into the small room, running her slender finger tips over the top of the chest of drawers, she looked around taking in the sight of the single bed pushed against one wall and the small wardrobe neatly tucked into the corner of the room.
‘I’m sorry it’s not much, but it’s a bed and it’s warm and there’s somewhere to hang your clothes’ he sighed out ‘and we can get you some things to brighten it up, I can even redecorate for you if you want’ Mike continued to enthuse watching his sister as she danced her eye’s around the room.
Placing the palm of her hand over her stomach she circled it affectionately,
‘This is going to do just fine, isn’t it little one’ she whispered to herself before turning on her heels and beaming a huge toothy smile at her waiting brother.
‘Thank you so much’ she said wrapping her arms around the burly man’s waist as she nestled the side of her face into his manly chest getting a hug and a chuckle in return.
‘It’s not me you should be thanking’ he replied rocking his sister affectionately from side to side.
Sophie could hear the mumbled interaction between the siblings from her where she was sat at the kitchen table caressing a tall glass of orange juice, she lifted it to her mouth as she took a long slow sip, letting her mind slip back to a time before Vicky, a time before the crash, and to a time when things were simple and easy. She thought about her own relationship with her sister, and how little they had in common, but then again perhaps that was the reason they got on so well. Smiling Sophie reminisced about how well Rosie had taken her announcement of her sexuality, chuckling to herself as she remembered the look of utter shock followed by her older sister’s favourite words ever
‘OMG babes, that’s just totes amazing’
She missed Rosie, she missed how she would say things without thinking, she missed the fact that Rosie didn’t seem to have one iota of tact in her whole body, making Sophie convulse into laughter at the latest inappropriate thing she’d said or did and she also missed the softer side to Rosie, the caring (in her own way) side, the supportive side. She missed how her sister used to fuss around her, trying her best to ‘girly’ her up for dates, trying to get her to wear the most outrageous items of clothing insisting that the tarty gear she had picked out for the more reserved Webster sister looked ‘amazeballs’ on her, before Sophie would inevitably grunt her disapproval and change into something more ‘appropriate’. And Sophie just missed having her sister there, just some-one to lean on, and not have to talk to, some-one who didn’t push her to ‘open’ up and ‘talk about things’. Rosie was so good like that, knowing Sophie would talk when she was ready and not before, and Sophie loved her for it.
‘Ahem’ the cough from the doorway abruptly brought Sophie out of her daydream
‘Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt’ Sian said shyly as she rocked back on her heels with her hands tucked into her jeans back pockets.
‘No you didn’t’ Sophie replied smiling as she beckoned the blonde girl to sit at the table with her.
‘Want some juice’ she offered turning in her seat as she stood up picking up a clean glass from the draining board.
‘Yes... please’ Sian replied as Sophie turned back towards her smiling with the glass in her hand.
‘Um Mike’s gone to meet Amy’ the blonde haired girl announced as she pulled the chair away from the table to sit down. Sophie nodded her understanding as she poured the liquid into the glass, spilling a little as her hand shook.
‘Whoa’ Sian laughed out as she reached across steadying Sophie’s hand with her own, making the brunette catch her breath slightly at the tingling sensation the small gesture made her feel.
‘Jesus, what’s happening to me’ the brunette thought as a tinge of a blush started to creep its way up her neck and into her cheeks. The attraction she felt towards the blonde was undeniable, and it scared her, it frightened her to death. The last time she’d felt like this was the night she’d met Vicky, the tightness in the chest, the dry mouth and the inability to string more than two words together in a coherent sentence, it felt so familiar, and with that familiarity came the feeling of guilt. Straightening her demeanour Sophie coughed lightly, as she made herself remember who this young woman was.
‘That’s fine.... thanks’ Sian said stopping the brunette from overfilling her glass.
Sophie smiled as she lowered the carton.
‘Um I just wanted to say thanks’ Sian said in an attempt to break the awkward silence that had developed between the pair over the last few minutes.
‘It’s really good of you to let me stay’ she continued as Sophie shrugged and shook her head.
‘No it’s fine, really’ Sophie replied curtly standing and placing her glass in the sink.
‘Mike was worried about you, so it seemed a good compromise, anyway it’s not for long is it’ the brunette continued tersely as she washed her glass, throwing Sian slightly with her abrupt demeanour.
‘Um no’ the young blonde replied a little shaken by her brother’s best friend brusque manner.
‘Right well make yourself at home then’ Sophie continued as she spun to see the slightly stunned expression on the blondes face. ‘God she’s stunning isn’t she’ she thought just as Vicky’s face flashed into her memory and a wave of guilt enveloped her once again.
‘There’s food in the fridge or pizza in the freezer if you’re hungry’ Sophie announced as she pushed herself away from the sink unit. ‘Just help yourself, but just make sure to clean up after’ she continued as Sian nodded.
‘okay then I’ll leave you to it, I’m tired I’m going to bed’ Sophie announced as she briskly strode out of the kitchen taking the half full whiskey bottle and glass out of the sideboard in the living room as she passed.
‘Um okay, night then’ Sian replied getting no response as she watched perplexed as Sophie walked away from her.
Shit, she really doesn’t like me’ the young blonde thought as she exhaled a long breath. ‘I need to get out of here as soon as possible’.
Sophie stood looking out of her bedroom window bottle of whiskey in one hand and a half full glass in the other, sipping silently as she stared out into the moonlit night listening to the soft music playing quietly on her ipod, thinking of the blonde less than 40 feet away from her. Why the hell was she having this effect on her, she couldn’t think straight around her, her mind got muddled and her senses went awry.
‘Shit’ she spat out to herself taking another large swallow of the whiskey grimacing at the burning sensation in her throat, she tried to force herself to think of something else, something other than the beautiful, straight, pregnant sister of her best friend sat in her kitchen. Inevitably the only thing that came to mind was ‘Vicky’, Sophie’s mind wandered to how things would have been between them if the accident had never happened. Would they have kids by now?, it was something they’d discussed at length and both wanted, but agreeing that they would only consider it once they were more financially secure.
Why did we have to wait’ Sophie cursed herself ‘why the hell did we have to wait?
‘If we’d have had kids, at least I’d still have a little piece of her with me’ she thought as tears pricked her eyes. Sniffing loudly she filled the glass up again taking another large gulp.
Sian wandered around the flat, steadily getting her bearings, she found the bathroom, and she obviously knew where her bedroom was. Now she was casually looking around the living room, looking at the mementos and photos accumulated there. Smiling to herself she lifted a silver framed photo of Mike and Sophie both pulling faces at the camera laughing, noticing as a piece of paper floated down from the back of the frame, picking it up she noticed it was cutting from a newspaper. Placing the frame back on the shelf she unfolded the piece of paper and began to read. It was an obituary for a ‘Victoria Helen Millington’ aged 23 tragically killed in a car accident. Sian’s breath hitched as she read on, how many siblings she left, her grieving parents and loving Grand Parents, her friends and lastly her devoted girlfriend ‘Sophie Webster’.
‘What are you doing’,
Sian jumped at the words hissed out at her as she spun around to come face to face with the angry contorted features of her brother’s obviously drunk friend.
‘I’m sorry’ she stuttered as she quickly re-folded the piece of paper, ‘I didn’t mean to pry, it just’
‘But you did anyway’ Sophie snapped not letting Sian finish her sentence as she snatched the piece of paper out of the younger woman’s hand.
‘I’m, I’m sorry’ Sian repeated as she tucked her hands in her pockets backing away slightly.
Sophie raised her bloodshot eyes to meet the startled expression of her newly acquired flatmates.
‘No’ she sighed out realising that her aggressive stance had obviously frightened the blonde ‘I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have snapped at you like that, it’s just ............. it’s private’, Sophie continued her voice quietening to a whisper.
‘I know, and I’m sorry’ Sian replied seeing for the first time the vulnerability and pain behind the brunette’s eyes.
‘I really didn’t mean any harm, I was just looking at the photo of you and Mike and it just sort of fell out of the back of the frame’ she offered desperate to explain her actions to her new landlord.
Sophie sighed as she let her eyes drop from the panicking orbs staring at her, slumping down onto the sofa she unfolded the piece of paper as she ran her finger tips over the words. Sensing that her company wasn’t desired Sian started to walk towards her room, when she heard a sound little more than a whisper,
‘It’s been 3 years’ the words stopping the blonde in her tracks ‘3 years and I still can’t talk about it’
Turning she saw a single tear roll down the brunette’s cheek, as a wave of sympathy washed over her, it was so obvious that she was still in so much pain, so much turmoil. Standing still not making a sound Sian waited for Sophie to continue, but nothing came, all that happened was that the brunette glugged another mouthful of whiskey back before stretching her legs out across the sofa and closing her tear filled eyes. Sian stood and watched as slowly the empty glass fell from the brunette’s hand rolling onto the floor. Walking silently across the room Sian reached across taking the throw that was on the back of the couch, laying it across the sleeping brunette, she bend down as she gently brushed some hair away from her face. She didn’t know what it was about this woman that intrigued her, all she knew was that she wanted to protect her, look after and care for her, but somehow she knew this wasn’t some-one that would accept her help that easily.
high heels

The Weakness In Me (chapter 2)

Chapter 2
All she knew was that her friend, her friend who’d stood by her, dried her tears and comforted her in her darkest hours, her friend who’d been there through thick and thin, her best friend in the world needed her help and she wasn’t about to let him down.
The evening was cool and fresh, it was the end of the summer and autumn was just around the corner. Sophie had been sat in the bar quietly nursing a bottle of lager, while watching Mike play pool, laughing lightly as he missed a sitter of a shot which bounced against the back of the pocket ricocheting back out scattering the remaining ball’s across the green felted table.
‘Hiya’ Tina said shimmying down onto the stool next to the brunette, nudging her with her shoulder as she did so.
‘Hi Teen’ Sophie replied nodding and smiling her acknowledgement.
Sophie had met Tina at the Uni’s LBGT society one Tuesday evening, laughing at her outrageous sense of humour and witty turn of phrase. They’d hit it off immediately becoming firm friends, and it was at one of Tina’s legendary ‘End of summer’ parties that Sophie and Vicky had met.
And when Vicky died, Tina saw that a little bit of Sophie died too. She grieved with her, held her up at the funeral and calmed her down at the wake. But over the following weeks Sophie pushed her away like she had everyone else, hurting her with acerbic words said in haste and anger and more often than not in alcohol, until eventually she wouldn’t speak to Tina at all, wouldn’t open the door or return her calls. And it had been Tina who’d contacted Mike knowing that if anyone could get through to Sophie it would be him.
‘Is he winning or losing’ Tina asked lifting the beer bottle she’d been carrying to her lips as she took a gulp.
‘Losing’ Sophie replied with a chuckle.
‘How long before he kicks off’ Tina asked fishing her phone out of her handbag checking the text she’d just received.
‘Any minute now’ was the reply just as Mike threw the pool cue across the table pulling out a £10 note from his pocket thrusting it at his opponent with a grunt.
‘Fucking cheat’ Mike growled out disgruntled flopping down on the remaining stool at the table.
Sophie and Tina looked at each other amused as there each cocked an eyebrow at the statement.
‘How many times have I told you, you shouldn’t bet against him Mike, he semi professional for Christ’s sake’ Sophie laughed out as she took a long swig of cold beer.
‘Semi professional my arse, he’s shit’ Mike muttered angrily.
‘Yeah but he can beat you though’ Tina laughed joining in with the teasing, only to get angry grimace in return.
‘So’ Sophie quipped smiling wide eyed as Tina’s laughter began to wane ‘when are we going to meet this mysterious girlfriend then’
Mike’s features visibly softened as a shy smile crossed his lips.
‘Later’ he replied lifting his eye’s to meet the bemused gaze of his flatmate and her friend.
‘She’s meeting me here in a bit’ he continued as Sophie pursed her lips letting out a loud animated ‘ooooo’ whilst playfully punching his arm lightly.
‘Can’t wait to meet her’ Tina piped up, ‘see how long it takes me to steal her away from you’, she semi joked teasingly poking out her tongue at the stern features of the rugged man sat opposite her.
‘I’m warning you’ Mike started to growl leaning forward pointing his index finger menacingly at the grinning features of the dark complexioned woman sat opposite him.
‘Oh pack it in the pair of you’ Sophie spat out swatting Mike’s manly hand down.
‘She’s only joking, she wouldn’t’ the brunette continued as Mike adjusted his position on the stool huffing.
‘Right’ she continued happy that the tension between her two friends had been broken ‘who’s for another’ she continued as she stool making her way over to the bar.
‘Oh come on mate, you know I was only joking’ Tina said after a few minutes of the silent treatment form the dirty blonde headed man sat scowling down at the beer mat on the table top.
‘Mate’ she continued as she shuffled her stool around the small table throwing her arm around  the rugged man’s neck pulling his head towards her as she dotted kisses into his rapidly receding hairline, pinching his cheek with her free hand at the same time.
‘Alright, alright’ Mike laughed out lapping up the attention.
Sophie smiled as she witnessed the jokey interaction between her two best friends, she’d be lost without them, she’d put them through so much and still they were there for her. She only hoped that if either of them ever needed her in the way she needed them after that fateful night, she’d be up to the job and be able to support and comfort them the way she had been. That’s why she hadn’t hesitated when Mike asked about his sister, how could she refuse, how could she turn her away, when Mike was so obviously worried about her. She knew that her agreeing to her moving in would create havoc, turn their idyllic peaceful lives upside down, but what else could she do, she knew this would only scratch the surface of the debt she owed the big man and she was more than happy to oblige.
‘So Sophie tells me your sister’s moving in with you’ Tina said taking the bottles of beer out of Sophie’s hands and placing them on the table top.
‘Yeah it’ll just be for a while; she’s on the housing associations waiting list, so hopefully she’ll have her own place soon’. He replied lifting the fresh beer bottle to his lips.
‘How far gone is she’ Sophie interjected settling down onto the stool.
’10 weeks I think’ Mike replied ‘so she should have her own place easily by the time the babies due’ he continued.
‘Where’s the Dad’ Tina questioned
‘That little shit’ Mike spat out ‘she hasn’t seen him since she told him’ he replied grunting his disgust.
‘He told her not to worry everything would be fine, and then she hasn’t seen hide nor hair of him since, one of his friends told her that he’s gone on holiday with his new girlfriend’.
‘Twat’ Tina spat out
‘Yeah I know’ Mike replied ‘near damn broke her heart, and then on top of all that, my shit of a Father tried to force her to go to a clinic’. He continued in quiet exasperated tones.
‘Bastard’ Sophie interjected shaking her head and she huffed out a disbelieving breath.
‘You know she’s had it so hard all her life’ Mike continued placing his bottle back on the cardboard beer mat as his gaze concentrated on the label he was picking at.
‘She’s had to live on her own with that brute since I left for Uni, and I know he hit her, she wouldn’t say anything, but I just knew. Every time I went home she’d have some sort of bruise on her and she’d tell me she got it playing hockey, or she’d slipped and banged herself, but I just knew it was him’, he continued as Sophie reached across covering his hand with her own rubbing reassuringly.
Looking up he gave Sophie a sad smile.
‘I just want to be there for her this time’ He whispered out sadly ‘I’ve never been able to help her before, but I’m damned if I’ll let her down this time’ he continued in a determined tone.
‘Don’t worry’ Sophie replied as she continued to rub his hand ‘You couldn’t let her down, you’re too good of a brother to do that’.
Mike smiled acknowledging the supportive words of his friend.
‘Okay, my round I think’ Mike said brightly after a few minutes silence.
‘Do you know what you’re letting yourself in for’ Tina whispered out as Mike got out of earshot.
‘What can I do Teen’ Sophie sighed out ‘He need’s my help, I won’t turn my back on him, not now’ she continued getting a resigned smile and a nod in return.
‘And anyway like he said she’ll have her own place by the time the babies due, and let’s be honest even if she hasn’t it’s not like the baby will keep me up at night is it’ she huffed out referring to her endless sleepless nights.
‘Is that not getting any better babe’ Tina enquired throwing Sophie a sympathetic look.
‘Nah’ the brunette replied shaking her head.
‘What about those pills the Doctor gave you’ Tina enquired
‘They just make me drowsy all day Teen, no good at all’ Sophie replied taking a swig from the beer bottle.
Tina braced herself knowing the reaction she was about to get.
‘Look babe, I know you said you did want to do it, but don’t you think it’s about time you thought about counselling’ she said leaning forward getting the young brunettes attention.
‘No’ Sophie growled out taking another gulp of the cool liquid.
‘It might help, let you get things off your chest’
‘No’ Sophie shouted snapping her eye’s to meet the brown orbs staring at her, cutting off Tina mid sentence ‘The last thing I want to do Tina, the very last thing I want to do is bring it all up again, live through all that again,........... I can’t’ the distraught brunette said her voice quietening to an emotional whimper.
‘Okay’ Tina relented knowing that Sophie still wasn’t at the stage where she could talk about Vicky and what had happened.
The table went quiet once more as both women took stock of what had just been said between them. Looking up Tina noticed Mike beckoning to some-one at the doorway to come to him, scanning her eyes around the horde of people she noticed some-one wave back at him.
‘Oh my God’ she spat out nudging Sophie and indicating with her head in the direction of the bar.
‘That must be the girlfriend’ she continued as Sophie craned her neck trying to get a better view.
Both women looked at each other wide-eyed in shock when the woman he’d been waving to, flung herself into his waiting arms and was lifted off the ground and swung around before being hugged tightly by the usually emotionally impassive man.
‘Shit’ Tina gasped out ‘She is gorgeous’
Sophie sat wide eyed as she watched the spectacle unfold. Tina was right she was stunning, not just attractive but strikingly so. Sophie was struck by how beautiful this woman was, she had a smile that lit up the room, and a presence about her that made every head turn in the bar when she walked in. She wasn’t anything like Sophie had expected, she didn’t know what she was expecting but that goddess certainly wasn’t it. Both women watched open mouthed as Mike handed the woman what looked like a vodka and orange and beckoned towards the table the women were sat at.
‘Close your mouth Soph’ Tina whispered nudging her ‘You’re drooling’
Quickly Sophie snapped her jaw shut as she dragged her fingers around her mouth, just double checking that Tina wasn’t right and she didn’t have drool running down her chin.
‘Shrrup’ she retorted quickly turning in her seat as Mike and his companion got closer.
‘Hey’ he wheezed out plonking the 3 beer bottles on the table top.
‘Tina, Sophie, I’d like to introduce you to some-one that’s very special to me’ He beamed.
‘This is Sian, my sister’.
high heels

The Weakness in Me (Chapter 1)

Leaning against the kitchen worktop, Sophie flicked down the kettle switch as she reached over and picked her phone up off the counter top where it had been charging since she went to bed a few hours earlier. She sighed out heavily to herself at the time blinking brightly from it. 3.45am. This had become the usual pattern for the young brunette, going to bed exhausted, falling into an uneasy, often broken sleep, then waking up at some ungodly hour, unable to make herself succumb once more to some much needed slumber. She hated this time of the day it was too quiet, too hushed. She hated the stillness of the dead of night it just didn’t feel right, she was much happier watching the sun rise and a new day begin; she loved the hustle and bustle daylight inevitably brought.

Life hadn't been easy for the young woman her business that she had started 4 years previously, was struggling. The small bookshop she’d opened on a road near the University in Salford initially went well. Student’s poured in looking for that elusive hardback text book for their course, or picking out a classic that Sophie specialised in tracking down.

She loved book’s, always had, she could escape into a good book, a book could take her to places no film ever could. She was passionate about them, reading any new book that came onto the market with a recommendation ardently, with enthusiasm and an open mind, only to give her own recommendations to her clientele when asked for her opinion, which was always heeded.

But along with the cutbacks and increased tuition fee’s came the consequences and now the recession was biting hard, she’d barely been able to take a wage the last 9 months and was barely surviving. She knew she’d have to make a decision about her future and the future of her business and she’d have to make one soon. She’d invested so much into that little shop, literately blood, sweat and tears, as well as her parents £20,000 and it was all disappearing right in front of her eyes. This in all likelihood she surmised was the reason for her disturbed semi sleepless nights, that along with the nightmares that had persistently haunted her for the past 3 years. Laying her head on top of her forearms that were folded in front of her on top of the table, she closed her eyes letting out a long exhausted sigh.

‘Just 5 minutes’ she thought ‘I’ll just close my eyes for 5 minutes’

‘Hey come on, Webbers, you’ve done it again babes’

Fingers being jabbed in her ribs and the loudness of the words shouted out by her flatmate made the brunette literally jump out of her skin.
Mike was as good a friend as anyone could have; they’d met at University and just seem to gravitate to one another, initially of course it had been pure animal attraction on Mike’s part, oh yeah he fancied Sophie along with 95% of the uni males under 30’s, and in part they had ‘dabbled’ although very quickly realising that being friends was a much better option, although at the time Mike didn’t fully realise the real reason why.

Mike had been there for Sophie through thick and thin, good and bad, through confusion and then eventually clarity as finally at the age of 19 Sophie embraced the feelings she’d been denying to herself and everyone else around her, her whole life, she was gay, she liked girls and she just couldn’t deny it any longer. And Mike was there to see her through the difficulties that, that clarification brought. The initial shock then finally acceptance from her family and friends, her first love and along with it her first broken heart. And he’d been there for her after the accident, after that one split second that changed the young woman’s life forever, he’d been there when she cried out in pain and screamed in anger, pushing everyone away, blaming God and the world and anything else she could think of for devastating her life in the way it had. Yeah he’d been there through all of it with her, the happy, the sad, the rebellion and the calm, he’d see it all, and he loved her all the more for it.

And now since things had got difficult financially for the young brunette and she couldn’t afford the upkeep and rent on her flat on her own he’d moved in with her. It had made perfect sense, Mike at the tender age of 26 was one of the leading members at the universities Biochemical research department, specialising in the detection and treatment of parasitic diseases, and as Sophie’s flat was just a 10 minute walk away from the University him moving in made perfect sense, and they revelled in their new domestic arrangement.

Mike was the kind of bloke everybody adored he was charming, handsome, intelligent and shrewd. He was a lady’s man and at the same time a bloke’s bloke. His army of friends kept him more than occupied during any free time he had, between his football practice twice a week, a weekly pool tournament, Wednesday evening squash and every Saturday afternoon spent in the pub watching either the rugby or whatever football match was being shown on TV that day. And he had no problem attracting the female of the species either, he liked female company and they seemed to like him, yep he was popular alright, very popular, often turning up on a Saturday or Sunday morning all wild hair and creased clothes, making Sophie giggle and more than often blush as he imparted in a completely ungentlemanly way what he and his latest conquest had got up to the night before. But recently all that had changed, Mike had met some-one, he’d got himself a girlfriend and he was smitten, this woman had completely bowled him over, knocked him for six, and it intrigued Sophie, who could be this femme fatal that had calmed the wild ways of ‘The Mike’.

‘Tonight my dearest friend, me and you are hitting the town’ Mike announced filling the kettle at the sink.

‘Huh’ Sophie replied raising her weary head off the tabletop and opening one eye at the statement.

‘Can’t I’m broke’ she announced before letting her head drop dramatically once more onto her crossed over arms.

‘Yep, but I’m not’ Mike replied with a grin ‘payday’ he sang as he took 2 mugs placing them on the counter top.

Sophie groaned at her friend’s excitement, sighing she straightened up raking her fingers through her wayward messy bed hair with one hand as she rubbed her tired eyes with the other.

‘I’m not really up to it mate’ she answered with a yawn.

And in truth she wasn’t, it had only been a few weeks since her break up with Emma, the split hadn’t completely been unexpected, nobody could say that it had taken them completely by surprise the relationship between them had been strained for months. The truth being that Sophie’s heart was never really in it, she cared for Emma of course she did, but her heart never belonged to her, no that particular part of her anatomy had long been claimed by some-one other, some-one who she loved and who had loved her back........... Vicky.

They’d met at a friend’s party, it was love at first sight for Sophie, Vicky was different from anyone else she’d ever met, she was funny and intelligent, and she was beautiful, breathtaking in fact, she had long blonde hair that changed colour slightly every time the light caught it in a different way, her eyes were the colour of melted chocolate that dilated into blackness during the throes of passion, her lips were a luscious pink and her skin tanned, the attraction between them was palpable and immediate, after the initial introduction they’d spent the rest of the night tucked away in some corner, talking, laughing and flirting outrageously until the early hours of the morning.

They made plans to meet up again after that night, little knowing that a day wouldn’t go by when they didn’t see each other after that first meeting. Then 2 years of bliss was abruptly ended, brutally halted by the careless actions of a drunken driver. Vicky had finished her shift at the pub she had a part time job at, she’d texted Sophie saying she was on her way over, but she never arrived. The crash was so horrific it was all over the news, her car had been rammed into the path of an oncoming lorry, sending it spinning out of control and rolling it 3 times before it came to a stop upside down on its roof, she’d been killed instantly. The tragedy sent Sophie into a spiral of deep depression punctuated by drunken rages, distancing herself from her worried family and close friends, losing herself for days in alcoholic stupors. That was until Mike intervened, he let her vent, let her take out her frustrations and pain on him. He hugged her when she needed it, left her to cry when she had to and slowly brought her back from the edge of the darkness that had engulfed her. It had taken her 2 years to even think about another relationship, and when Mike introduced her to a ‘family friend’ Emma, Sophie thought she was finally at a place where she could love again, but she was wrong, the guilt was just stifling for the brunette, yes Vicky was dead but she was still as much in love with her memory as she’d ever been with her, and she just couldn’t shake that feeling, no matter how much she tried.

She knew Emma was perfect girlfriend material, she was pretty, funny, attentive, and loving, and she’d undoubtedly fallen in love with Sophie the first time she met her, but she knew Sophie never felt the same, and when they finally sat down and said the words that had been praying on both women’s minds for so long, it had been painful. Lots of tears were shed and ‘You know I’ll always care about you’ said between them before a final embrace.

In truth Sophie was relieved, but that didn’t mean she didn’t miss Emma, miss the odd night they spent watching some cheesy 80’s horror film eating popcorn on the sofa, it didn’t mean she didn’t miss the cheeky bum slaps she got every time she passed her ex-girlfriend in the hallway, it didn’t mean she didn’t miss the unexpected lunchtime visit’s when Emma would turn up with the latest weird sandwich combination she’d just discovered at ‘Subway’ for Sophie to try, and it didn’t mean she didn’t miss her, just miss the company, the conversation, the companionship, the intimacy.

‘Well to be honest Soph, I do have an ulterior motive for wanting to ply you with drink’ Mike said turning as he switched the kettle on.
‘No’ Sophie replied as she stood

‘You don’t know what I’m gonna ask yet’ Mike replied following the brunette through the flat.

‘No you’re not moving your girlfriend in’ Sophie replied slamming the bathroom door behind her stopping the tall blonde man’s advance.
‘Hell no’ Mike shouted through the wooden obstacle between them ‘why the hell would I want to do that, I’ve only been seeing her 6 weeks’.
Slowly Sophie opened the door to be met by the pouting features of her flat mate.

‘What then’ she asked leaning against the door frame, folding her arms across her chest.

‘It’s my sister’ he sighed out, slumping back against the wall opposite.

‘She’s got herself into a bit of bother, and she need’s somewhere to stay for a while’ he continued as he stared intently at the by now concerned features of his flatmate.

‘What’s happened’ Sophie questioned reaching out to her best friend and rubbing his arm comfortingly.

Sighing Mike shook his head as he let his gaze lower to the floor,

‘She’s got herself pregnant’,

‘Shit’ came the reply as Sophie slumped back against the wall.

‘You know what my Dad’s like Soph, he went ape shit on the lad’s arse, and now the little scum bag’s took off leaving her on her own’.
Sophie smiled sympathetically and nodded for her friend to continue.

‘Dad’s really not happy about it, putting pressure on her to get rid of the baby, but she’s having none of it’ he hesitated tilting his head downwards he closed his eyes ‘he’s thrown her out Soph’.

‘No’ Sophie replied in shock, ‘What’s your Mum said about it’ she continued ducking her head trying to catch his eye.

‘She doesn’t care, does she’ Mike replied angrily throwing his head back, ‘She’s too busy swanning around with her latest conquest to care about her 20 year old pregnant, homeless daughter’.

Sophie shook her head in disbelief puffing out a disgusted huff. Yeah she knew Mike’s family, knew them too damn well, his violent, obnoxious Father, and his uncaring, unloving, hard-hearted Mother who just up and left them one day when Mike was 11 and his sister just 5.

‘Look Mike, of course she can stay here until she get’s herself sorted’ Sophie said rubbing his arm reassuringly.

‘We’ve got a spare room it’s no hassle’. She continued offering as much support to her friend as she could.

‘It’ll only be for a couple of month’s Soph’ he replied smiling ‘she’ll be out of here before the baby’s born’ he continued, relief evident on his rugged features, ‘and I’ll pay her way, don’t worry about that, you won’t be out of pocket I promise’

Sophie smiled ‘It’s fine Mike, honest tell her she can come over any time........ okay’.

Mike grinned and nodded as he pushed himself away from the wall.
‘She’s sleeping on a friend’s couch at the moment in Bury; I’ll give her a call later and tell her the good news’. Sophie smiled and nodded.
‘How about that cup of tea eh’ he said rubbing his hands together as he brushed past the brunette and made his way back towards the kitchen.
’20 eh’ Sophie piped up following her flatmate into the kitchen ‘can’t believe she’s 20 Mike, the last time I saw he she was just a gawky kid at your 21st birthday party I think’.
‘Yeah’ Mike laughed pouring the steaming water into the teapot, ‘She was so sulky wasn’t she, she had those horrendous braces on her teeth and those NHS glasses do you remember’.
Sophie laughed as she thought back to that night, but in all honesty she was much too drunk to remember much about it at all.
All she knew was that her friend, her friend who’d stood by her, dried her tears and comforted her in her darkest hours, her friend who’d been there through thick and thin, her best friend in the world needed her help and she wasn’t about to let him down.